Wednesday, November 28, 2007

(Un)solicited Advice for New Parents


It seems we know lots of folks who are pregnant right now, and several have asked for our advice.  There is so much information out there (e.g., we now own over 50 books now on pregnancy, childcare, and children) that it can be overwhelming.  Here are the top 5 recommendations that have been the most helpful to us (in no particular order):
1) You know your baby: you may not know anyone else's baby, but you will know your own.  Don't let other's advice side-track what you know to be true.
2) Don't criticize your partner's parenting:  It is critical that both parents be involved and bonded with baby; your spouse won't do everything the way you would do it- be open to the possibility that their way is just as good as yours, or that they need to learn from experience.
3) Newborns cry out of need, not want:  For the first three months, babies know nothing of manipulation (much less cause and effect).  Educate yourself about their needs and how to fill them; nothing is more important or more satisfying as a parent.  Toward that end...
...4) Learn about the "5 S'es": When the need of your baby is to calm a new, raw nervous system, there is a science to soothing that many parents swear by.  Read "The Happiest 
Baby on The Block" by Harvy Karp, or watch the video, to learn how.  This is especially 
critical for colicy babies.  We used his techniques starting in the hospital to wonderful effect.
5) Learn about the importance of sleep (for you and baby) and how to get into a good rhythm 
to promote it.  We found the EASY (eat, awake/activity, sleep, you) approach worked well- "Babywise" (another popular book) also promotes the idea of eating upon waking, rather than before sleep.  We liked the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" for advice on sleep and how to promote it. A well-rested baby is a happy baby!

Good luck to all those new parents out there! Taking care of a baby is simple, although not easy. It's a lot of work, but for us, nothing has been more satisfying or rewarding.

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